Zul'Banunu, part 1

Introduction

First of all, I have to say this will probably make no sense whatsoever, and will be completely random to the average human being (especially if you've no idea what the Hell the Zandalari is). It all started many years ago when a young boy couldn't pronounce "banana" correctly. He instead called them "banunus", and his nickname "Nunu" (rightfully so) was born. After a little thought of him being humiliated and sharing his wrath with the world, I decided to make a minor story about this.

Prologue

Zul'Banunu, somewhere in Kalimdor....

"Dis is obsurd!" Barked Vol'jin's messenger. He was stood in front of the sacred pit of fires, and his eyes glimmered with fear and anger. The Troll in front of him was not happy. Zan'unu was not pleased by the messenger's tongue, and decided he was not welcome in his home.
"Obsurd?" Asked Zan'unu, turning around slowly, unsheathing his sword - a curved blade with peels around the hilt, like that of a banana. "DIS! BE! ZUL'BANUNU!" Zan'unu bellowed, and kicked the messenger into the pit of fire with his three toed foot. He sliced his way through the messenger's bodyguards, and those who surrendered joined forces with him.
"Zul'Banunu.... goes.... TO WAR!"


And so the war with Zan'unu begun. Vol'jin, leader of the Darkspear Tribe and the Horde's Trolls had no choice but to fight for his place. Zan'unu could not spread his tropical tyranny around the world, nor could he let his divine brews and gifts of the jungles sway Garrosh for a place in his beloved Horde. It was then, Vol'jin had decided to call for Azeroth's greatest fighters and healers, to conquer....

THE ZUL'BANUNU MENACE!

High Priest Banuxis

Once a respectable brewmaster, now a slave to his own creations, Banuxis joined Zan'unu in an attempt to gain access to the sweetest fruits in the Zan'Banunu jungles. His fruit-bat servants reign supreme in his area, and swoop down on intruders before they encounter him.

• Banana Trail: Banuxis will ride his land-banana boat, scraping its pastes around the arena. Should players stand in this, they will suffer approximately 16,000 Nature damage for every second they remain in its venicity.
• Bananamana: Banuxis will use an elasticated banana to stick to two players. If they do not run away from each other fast enough, the banana will not snap, but instead make them collide and deal 40,000 Physical damage. If they split, however, the banana will burst, dealing 10,000 Nature damage to all players, and 100,000 to Banuxis. The damage done to Banuxis will increase if his banana shield is interrupted.
• Banana Bat: Banuxis will climb to his shrine and transform into a giant fruit bat, dealing Shadow, Physical and Nature damage to players who are within a 5 yard radius of him. When Banana Blood reaches five stacks on players, they must move immediately otherwise they will be killed instantly.

A HUGE Thankyou to the World of Warcraft EU Forums!

And by that I'm not being sarcastic! So, here goes....

HUGE THANKYOU!

While this all sounds fine and dandy to those who know what I'm talking about, others may be confused. Don't worry, I would be too. So, here's the linky to my thread that has been answered to my liking,

http://eu.battle.net/wow/en/forum/topic/2868757021#1

There you'll find the reason of my happiness. Yes, I'm learning to Tank. I started recently, and can I just say it was bloody wonderful! I can? Then it was bloody wonderful!

Yes, crap actionbar bindings, etc. Hey, at least I've got "T" for Taunt. I mean, seriously, having to actually move ones wrist to click buttons?! Pfft! Wow, long caption.

Johnior, in all his glory(?), is pictured above, as Captain Looms. He's changed quite a bit since then (perhaps in level and in gear, who knows), and is a happy chappy. But in his first two dungeons (both Deadmines. It's OK once, but c'mon, not twice in a row!), he's learnt a few things:

1. If you've never done it before (in any game for that matter), it's hard work. Having to remember the buttons (instead of hitting "W" and "G" for Jewelcrafting and Mining, when I wanted "2" for Strike, or "R" when I needed my Taunt button) can be tricky in the heat of battle.
2. Taking aggro can be annoying when you've got Captain Megapull taking aggro for you (as polite as it sounds, it's not. It's annoying for us Tanks).
3. Playing Warrior has got to be my favourite thing so far. Not just for Tanking, but it feels comfortable in quests too.
4. It has raised my self esteem massively. Knowing that I can lead the charge and I haven't been blamed for anything yet - it feels great!
5. Hunters can be EXTREMELY annoying for Aggro!*

The thrill of Taunting, Rending, Thunderclapping, ???-ing, then Profiting is wonderful. I feel that I'm not just mindlessly spamming buttons, doing a Captain Faceroll (lots of Captains, aren't there?) and gawfering "trololololo", but actually doing something beneficial.

* = OK, allow me to explain. When I finally learn the keybinds for my character, make sure that the Rend is applied BEFORE Thunderclap and have around 200%+ aggro, guess what happens? Captain Arrows - 30 yards away - is pew-pewing shots, attacking different targets to me and gaining aggro wherever. OK, this only happened once. But who replaced him? Oh, it was Captain Looms and Captain Priest combined to make.... Captain-Discipriest-in-looms? But OK, it was annoying. I can understand you wanna get your DoT in before I get aggro, but please, take some advice from my main: Wait at least 1.5, perhaps 2 seconds before you go ape shit with your weapons. While you may think the Tank's got aggro, his percentage could be 90% and glowing orange. There's barely anything stopping that mob from turning around, killing you and then saying "ffs nub tank wtf".

So, that's my experiences for now. I have to admit, I'm feeling a lot better playing WoW. Perhaps, after some training, I'll go back to Resto Druidism, and find more joy in directly helping.

And back to the boys and girls of the EU WoW forums - thanks ever so much for helping me out - for the advice, the courage and perhaps a few peeks at your armor! Best of luck!

Johnior, Sindor'ei Warrior ^_^